Cheese and Choux

First and foremost, my sincere apologies for my recent disappearance for a month.  It wasn't so much that I couldn't blog and/or cook much as I studied for the test -- though my delay was certainly due to those things.  No, I regressed into a much deeper, darker chasm.  For at least three weeks, I lived in a place where I only barely washed my hair.  On the days when my husband came home to see my hair in a curly knot on my head, I winced to hear him ask:  "You did bathe today, right?"  Our friends recently brought over their 15-month-old, and she was infinitely more mellow than me.  Most telling of all for your purposes however, our meals often dwindled to my husband's "bachelor" meals.  You know, chicken lovingly drizzled with barbecue sauce.  We ate lasagna for four days.  In the last week, the week of that troublesome test, we frequented every take-out place that we could find.  So, now you're beginning to understand.  It wasn't so much that I wasn't writing.  No, most sadly of all, the past three weeks left me with very little to write about.

So, before I forget anything else, Happy Belated Valentine's Day!  And before you get yourself in a tizzy, I know that it's a holiday that is manufactured for the greeting card industry.  Hallmark makes a killing.  Healthy relationships require an "I love you," or at least its finest equivalent, more than one day a year.  I do know all of this.  Nonetheless, I can't help but enjoy a holiday dedicated to flowers and chocolate.  I actually wish we had more days which trumpet love and kindness, but my friends have often remarked that I'm too idealistic as it is.  For most years (or at least the years that we have approached February a deux), Valentine's Day is important for my husband and I because it causes us to stop.  You know, we take a breath.  We pencil this date on the calendar in ink.  Our meal takes hours; we look forward to it all week.  We stop.  And, before you start, I understand that we should take this time everyday of the week.  But, even as an over-idealistic newlywed, that's never been my reality.

For this year in particular, I used magic marker to encircle V-Day on the calendar.  After weeks of divesting myself of any remnant of femininity and taking solace in my husband's old sweatpants, I can honestly say that I had the greatest anticipation for this evening with my valentine.  And in all of this studying and narrow-minded focus, it reminded me of something very important - yet easily forgotten: there is life beyond a test.  It was even inspiring.  Jalapeno and cheese biscuits.  Parmesan-encrusted Mahi Mahi.  A sturdy tower of asparagus over brown rice.  Chocolate soufflé, and raspberries with cream.  In only two weeks, I could remind myself on this Valentine's Day, I'll be back.

And so, nearly two weeks later, here I am.  It's March now, and it almost feels like spring.  The sun is high; the temperatures are lingering in the 50s (!!!); these piles of snow will soon be a thing of the past.  Even the robins have come back to us.  I believe that they're a bit impatient as well.  And just as I felt a bit rusty during my work-out this morning, I feel like I have to ease back into cooking.  I'll feel sore tomorrow, but we have to start with the basics.  A little olive oil in the pan.  Chopping vegetables briskly on the cutting board.  Kneading some bread.  So I think I'll start, with your permission, back at the beginning.  I'm starting with this recipe, because it's what I've always made at the end of exams.  I don't know when I started making this bread.  However, I know why I began with it again: on a most base level, it's a question of taking back your own time.  During any stressful period, we don't have time for the bread-making.  These rudimentary elements (the kneading, the hours ticked off, the scents wafting through a quiet home) simply feel like wasted time.  So, now that my time is my own again, I'll begin at my beginning.  This bread won't turn you off, because there's no yeast involved.  This bread won't be too mysterious for you, because it's only uniqueness is the browning of that one elemental ingredient.  So, give it a shot.  It's spring, and we might as well all begin again.

Brown Butter Soda Bread, pilfered from Bon Appetit, February 2006

Ingredients

1/4 cup (1/2 stick) unsalted butter

3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (*I use whole wheat; it tastes better)

1/2 cup old-fashioned oats

1 tablespoon sugar

1 tablespoon chopped fresh rosemary

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

3/4 teaspoon black pepper

1 3/4 cups buttermilk

1 egg white, beaten to blend

Instructions

Position rack in the center of the oven and preheat to 375 degrees.  Stir butter in heavy small saucepan over medium heat until melted and golden brown, about 3 minutes.  Remove from heat. 

Stir flour, oats, sugar, rosemary, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and 3/4 teaspoon pepper in large bowl to blend.  Pour buttermilk and melted browned butter over flour mixture; stir with a fork until flour mixture is moistened.

Turn dough out onto floured work surface.  Knead gently until dough comes together, about 7 turns.  Divide in half.  Shape each half into a ball; flatten each into 6-inch round.  Place rounds on ungreased baking sheet, spacing 5 inches apart.  Brush tops with beaten egg white.  Sprinkle lightly with ground black pepper.  Using a small knife, cut 1/2 inch deep X in top of each dough round.

Bake breads until deep golden brown and tester comes out clean, about 45 minutes.  Cool breads on rack at least 30 minutes.  Serve warm or at room temperature.